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‘Now that cremation is over…’: Ex-cricketer’s shocking disclosure about commentary

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File Pic: Laxman Sivaramakrishnan (TOI Photo)

NEW DELHI: Former India cricketer and renowned commentatorLaxman Sivaramakrishnanhas made another explosive revelation about his years in cricket broadcasting, alleging that he was forced to return to commentary duties immediately after his elder brother’s cremation.The former leg-spinner, who recently retired from the BCCI commentary panel citing “colour discrimination”, shared the emotional incident through a series of posts on social media on Thursday.“My elder brother passed away a few years earlier. We finished cremation in the evening, minutes after that, The Director Broadcasting of BCCI called me and said, ‘now that the cremation is over, can you take a flight the next morning to commentate on Ind v Aus Test in Mohali?’.I went,” Sivaramakrishnan wrote on X.The 60-year-old revealed that despite personal grief, he prioritised his professional commitments.“I sacrificed the mourning and went. My mother passed away when I was doing commentary in Pune. Having done all that, I was subject to whatever I went through,” he added.

‘That’s why I retired’In another post, Sivaramakrishnan hinted that the same individual was one of the major reasons behind his decision to step away from commentary duties earlier this year, although he stopped short of naming the person publicly.Back in March, just days before IPL 2026, Sivaramakrishnan had announced his retirement from BCCI commentary, alleging discrimination based on skin colour and claiming he was sidelined in favour of newcomers.The former India spinner, who represented the country in nine Tests and 16 ODIs, had earlier opened up in interviews about battling depression, anxiety and severe emotional trauma during his commentary career.

‘I thought I was going to die’In a deeply personal interaction with the Indian Express earlier this year, Sivaramakrishnan spoke about experiencing a mental breakdown during the IPL in the UAE during the Covid-19 period.“I was down completely and I didn’t want to see myself in the mirror,” he had said. “Whenever I was awake, I thought I was going to die.”He described terrifying hallucinations, sleepless nights and emotional isolation, while also alleging years of racism and appearance-based discrimination within cricket circles.Sivaramakrishnan further claimed he was often denied high-profile on-air roles because he was considered “not presentable”.“I’ve never done a toss or a presentation,” he said earlier, adding that producers allegedly told him they had been instructed not to put him in those positions.The former spinner also recalled painful experiences from his early cricketing days and said such incidents severely damaged his self-esteem at a young age.
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